Tuesday, September 16, 2008

What do you say?

What do you say to people who are ignorant to all that is around them? To people who are well meaning but just don't know how to say the right thing or really shouldn't say anything at all. Do you tell them to mind their own business or give them a piece of your mind? Do you ignore them? Do you use it as an opportunity to teach them about disabilities?
Often these moments I am thrown so off guard by people I say nothing at all. Elizabeth is getting bigger and her swaying walk is more obvious to others and we have had some mind blowing comments and questions that have left me speechless and often in tears.
What do you say to a person who asks me if I know there is something wrong with my child's legs? What do you say to the woman screaming at me because we have used our handicapped pass to park in a closer spot? How do you react to someone joking that my daughter is drunk? How do you deal with a person who is talking to my daughter like she does not understand a spoken word?
I would like to educate others about disability and all that Elizabeth has overcome but sometimes I just want to enjoy our outings and try to keep things as 'normal' as they can be. Sometimes I would like to tell them where to go and that it is none of their business.


Jacolyn said...

Stupid, stupid people!

Kellars Mommy said...

I wish I had the answer, or I wish someone had told me the correct thing to say all the times I've been caught off guard. People are ignorant, some don't mean to be, some were never taught any better and some I think just outright don't care! I posted a few months back about a lady who asked me "whats wrong with him" I at first wasn't bothered by it but later I got to thinking and realized that Kellars gait is obvious, it's not something that is only visible to those that love Kellar, anyone can see it, it was that harsh reality that sickened me! People try to talk to Kellar and he just ignores them or looks at them * I know he knows what they're saying he's just somewhat behind in speech * and they look at me like I can't believe that kid doesn't talk and walk off. Yes sometimes I do use that as a opportunity to tell them how far he has come and how blessed I am to have him in my life, other times I just smile and walk off..

Melissa said...

I am seriously thinking of putting a little sign on the back of Nate's walker. I get tired of the starring and questions.

I am getting a bit grouchy about the whole thing! lol

Shannon said...

Oh I so know how you feel. It totally sucks at times. I really don't have an answer for you. I am like Melissa and feel like I am just getting more angry at people as time goes on. I would love to have a sign on his wheelchair that says "what the &*@# are you looking at?" People are rude...and unfortunately I think this is something that we as moms will continue to deal with. It sucks but there isn't much we can do but enjoy our children and love them for them!!!!